The world is awful » Just for the record

My best friend Duchess Tianbabes got engaged. I had a text message at who knows what time on the night to tell me the news. I had been wondering where she was. In HK. I should tag her with some electronic device so I can track her movements.

I don't know if I congratulated her at the time. My thoughts were slurred, from the rem cycling my mind had been doing. Time differences are a pain.

I didn't imagine it:

The world is awful » Just for the record

Congratulations babes.

It's funny how news from your friends will always leave you back to selfish thoughts. I don't know when I will get engaged. And I have no idea what I want in a ring. Is it bad that I no longer dream about it? I used to hope so much. I guess I have finally stopped hoping. Now when I get the usual quizzing I reply one or all of the following:

"Oh, probably never."

"I can't be bothered."

"We'll probably just have a barbeque so don't hold thy breath..."

Am I bitter? Disappointed? Despondent? Resigned? No.. maybe the laidback nature of australia has finally caught up with me, and this is where it showed up.

Now I feel so amused when I see newly engaged friends breathless and gushing, 'I'm so happy.' Sure I join in, but I also feel relieved I am not the one suddenly on the crash liquid diet from hell for the next 7 months, and suffering from jitters, hunger pangs, and intense mood swings. All starvation related.

Only to emerge at the other end, thinner yes, but with the largeness of ones' nose accentuated by a skeletal jawline.

It's refreshing to know that my bestie did not experience a personality overhaul on December the 16th.

I love you Tianbabes, miss you loads. I wish I was there. You would know everything I was thinking as soon as I hugged you hello.